Title says it all. This is a random, non-planned out Fic. Mainly Valve and Acachalla characters.
Chapter 1: Let the Random Begin! Edit
Billy Acachalla took hid pet Turret, Bob the Portal Turret outside for a walk when a Enclave Solider ran around in circles. "I NEED PREMIUM HOT DOGS!!!" he shouted. Billy threw a Hotdog at his face and the Enclave Solider fell to the ground. "Thank you!!!!!!!!" He screamed as he flew away in his portable French Fry.
Bob Joe Bo Joe Mc. Joe Bo Bo Mc. Bobby Bo Jr. was walking outside when a Zombie Heavy hit his face with a Golden Frying Pan. "AHAHAHA! Zombie Heavy Jr. want Sammiches!" he screamed as he picked up a Sammich. Gordon Freeman smacked him in the face. "THAT IS A SAMMICH OF BLACK MESA INC.!!! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO PUT IT IN YO MOUTH!" he screamed "YES I DO BECAUSE I AM YOUR SON!" "WHAT?! PLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT TWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIST!!!!!!" Freeman said and they all ran around in circles and sang Everything is Awesome.
Papa Acachalla was hunting for Headcrabs when Joe the Combine Solider Jr. came lurking by. "Yo, Papa Scott-Challa! I need to find my TF2 Mug and T-shirt...Do you happen to know where it is?" he asked. "Ask Gman." Papa said. Joe walked over to Gman. "Can I get my TF2 stuff?" Gman screamed and became a Pop-Tart. "Oh well...'
Chapter 2: Yes, this has not ended yet! Sadly..... Edit
Joe Jack Jackie Joe Joe the Spy sneaked around the corner of TF2 Kingdom. The Ultimate Artifact of the TF2 Universe was right there....On display.....The Ultimate Yummy 2023 Karat Gold Heavy Sandvich! Joe Jack knew he could be a Millionaire if he took it, so he did. He punched and knocked out a Stormtrooper that was guarding the Sammich and took his armor. He took the Sammich and put it in his Helmet. He the bashed the window into pieces and jumped out. (James Bond music starts playing...Dun dun da dun dun dunada..) He landed on a black Van. "Step on it!" the Van went high speed and drived away. He shot all the guards with his blaster and took all of their helmets. Suddenly, a Animatronic named Freddy Fazbear punched Joe Jack in the face. Joe Jack kicked him off the Van and multiple Golden Freddys appeared. "We're under attack!" a Heavy appeared and ate all the Animatronics. "I did it! I completed the mission!" "Good job, Heavy. Now eat this Sandvich." He said as he gave a Spicy Sandvich to Heavy."I love the spicy ones!"
Papa Acachalla was taking Shimmer, Sally's Bird, on a walk. Suddenly, Chica the Animatronic ate a Pizza. "That's ironic...A Pizza Place mascot eating Pizza..." Papa Acachalla then turned into a bowl of Chilli and Shimmer flew away.
Chapter 3: The Amazing World of Random Edit
Chell, while holding her Portal Gun, walked inside McDonald's. "WHERE"S MEH BURGER?!" Alyx said as she punched the Fry Cook in the face. "Ask Doug!" he said as he pointed to a drunk Doug Rattman. "YO, RAT! I WANNA BURGER! NOW!" everyone morphed into cheese burger and a giant hawk ate them all.
Gordan Freeman was web swinging along New York, trying to find a Burger King. "IJHSOduhjoslkhdjksdkshgbdksbgk!" Heavy screamed and shot Gordan with a Rocket Launcher, but missed. Gordan threw Combine bombs at Heavy when suddenly the entire city was taken over by Dinosaurs, L4D Zombies, and a bunch of random NPCs and Daleks. Spider-Man punched a zombie in the face and Batman kicked a Ant-Lion with it's own foot. Gordan screamed and fell 25 levels down and into a sewer and Heavy became Man Artica and Spider-Man became Fanboy, and Batman became Chumchum and the entire city was nuked by the US Government with a rocket launcher filled with spaghetti and chilli.